How to become a Manchester United fan?

On an unrelated note, here's a fun post(no offense intended, just for laughs).

• Try ending every argument with '19'.
• Try to write GGMU wherever possible, especially at the most unexpected of places. For example, in a discussion involving the El Classico, say GGMU!
• Be a little arrogant in arguments. Well, don't consider the word 'little'.
• Keep dreaming about Champ20ns.
• Write "MUFC" in your name even if you can't name 10 players from the squad.
• Live no where near Manchester. 
• Mention how your youth academy is better than even better than La Masia.
• Say how the best players in the world would love to play for United. Also emphasize why Guardiola would love to succeed Ferguson.
• Say Sir Alex is the best ever and have no clue about who Matt Busby is.
• Put Christiano Ronaldo's picture as your Profile/Cover Pic, and hope for his return, which ain't happening.
• Accuse Liverpool fans of talking of history, but never stop talking of the '19'.
• Brag about the 8-2 against Arsenal, but forget about the 6-1 against City just weeks later.
• Look the other way (or pretend to do so) when referees favour United and say 'can we call it square' when one decision goes against them.

If you do atleast 5 of the things listed above, congrats, you are a Manchester United fan.